Book Review: "Somebody's Daughter" by Ashley C. Ford
“Somebody’s Daughter” by Ashley C. Ford
Bookshop | Kindle
Publisher Synopsis: Through poverty, adolescence, and a fraught relationship with her mother, Ashley Ford wishes she could turn to her father for hope and encouragement. There are just a few problems: he's in prison, and she doesn't know what he did to end up there. She doesn't know how to deal with the incessant worries that keep her up at night, or how to handle the changes in her body that draw unwanted attention from men. In her search for unconditional love, Ashley begins dating a boy her mother hates. When the relationship turns sour, he assaults her. Still reeling from the rape, which she keeps secret from her family, Ashley desperately searches for meaning in the chaos. Then, her grandmother reveals the truth about her father's incarceration . . . and Ashley's entire world is turned upside down.
Somebody's Daughter steps into the world of growing up a poor Black girl in Indiana with a family fragmented by incarceration, exploring how isolating and complex such a childhood can be. As Ashley battles her body and her environment, she embarks on a powerful journey to find the threads between who she is and what she was born into, and the complicated familial love that often binds them.
Trigger Warnings: rape, sexual assault
Rating (out of 5): 4.5
Review: I’ve been a fan of Ashley’s writing for a long time; I first became familiar with her through a podcast that I now can’t remember, but what has always impressed me about her is her ability to feel her feelings clearly and objectively. For someone who often has trouble articulating what I’m feeling (and why) (I’m super fun, ask my therapist), it’s incredibly powerful to read a memoir that’s as heart-wrenching and clearly written as this one.
Ashley writes about her childhood frankly—she no longer sees it through the eyes of a child, but she writes so honestly about how she felt at the time. She didn’t realize her family was poor, she didn’t understand why her mother wasn’t emotionally available to her in the way that she needed, and she didn’t know why her father was incarcerated.
Ashley’s writing is witty, straightforward, and so honest. She writes with clarity about her relationships and her rape. She also conveys (without beating you over the head with it) the rippling effects of incarceration. Her incarcerated father is not the only person who paid a price for his crimes; Ashley, her mother, her siblings, and their extended family were affected as well. It’s a meaningful look beyond the statistics.
When I finished “Somebody’s Daughter,” I first came away with the impression that it finished too abruptly. We spent a lot of time with Ashley as a child and adolescent, and very little while she was in college and after college. But the framing is truly about her relationship (or lack thereof) with her father. In the opening chapter, (adult) Ashley finds out her father is getting out prison, and then we return to her childhood and explore how growing up with an incarcerated father and emotionally unavailable mother affected her.
I love reading memoirs (…and not just celebrity memoirs) because I think it’s important to understand that the way I experience the world is vastly different from the way other people experience it. Obviously, we should all know at face value that that statement is true, but it’s important to read about others’ experiences and relationships to be a more empathetic, open person—and some things are truly universal, too. I underlined several passages in Ashley’s book because I related to them so much, and I think you will, too.
TL;DR: A beautifully written, frank, witty memoir. Ashley writes with honesty and clarity about growing up and claiming her own identity. While her experiences are her own, the themes and feelings are universal.
If you liked this, try:
“This Will Be My Undoing” by Morgan Jerkins (Bookshop | Kindle | my review)
“Know My Name” by Chanel Miller (Bookshop | Kindle | my review | Elizabeth’s review)
“Hungry: A Memoir of (My) Body” by Roxane Gay (Bookshop | Kindle)
If you click on one of the links in this article and make a purchase, She’s Full of Lit may receive a small commission. It doesn’t add anything to your price — we promise! Thanks so much for your support.
